Sunday, August 7, 2011

3 Rules for Retail

This weekend has been crazy at work. Back-to-School shopping.  Kids need new clothes. Uniforms. Grandmas trying to help out their children by purchasing school clothes for grandchildren. Those are the best customers. And a lot of the other customers are fantastic.

But for some of the others . . . If it were my store, I would have 3 Rules.  Well, three to start with.  I'll list others as necessary.

Rule #1: Customers will have to pass a test to be allowed to shop.  I mean, really.  Don't parents teach their children how to shop anymore?  I don't mean the children now.  I mean the parents.  Didn't their parents teach them how to shop?  Maybe I should lobby to have that added school curriculum.

Rule #2: No children under the age of 12 allowed in the store after 8 pm.  If I hear a kid crying in the store at 10 am or 3 pm, it's ok.  It happens. Kids cry.  But at 9 pm? Really?  Your toddlers should be at home, getting ready for bed if they're not already tucked in and snoring.

Rule #3: (This one courtesy of my supervisor.) If you come into my store and trash it, I get to go to your home and trash it. Yes, that includes leaving gum on the floor, soft drinks and food on your dressers and in your closets, and a multitude of other pieces of trash.

Yeah, there are sure to be more rules to come.  Or maybe just elaboration on these. But in the meantime, I'm going to watch something on Netflix. And try to go to sleep.